I'm high maintenance

High maintenance, arrogant, cocky… these among many others have been used to describe me many times, often whispered and occasionally right up front when either I meet a new friend or when a friend breaks into my inner circle.

To people I don’t allow into my inner circle of trust, I often come across as rather arrogant and aloof. I’ve had the luxury of being given the freedom to grow up and experience life as liberally as Asian parents can tolerate and now, I live life to the limits of many Asian sensibilities. It is this, which I believe is the source of my penchant for mischief and adventure that has enriched my life with crazy, wonderful stories and experiences.

Without a doubt, it’s the experiences we go through particularly in our formative and most impressionable years that make and mould how we choose to live life in the future. What we experience and go through as we grow up that we do not forget or in “shrink-speak”, repress but rather build on and to a certain extent hold onto as a credo, defines us. I know, I know, there are a lot more people with more amazing experiences and stories than me, but these are my experiences and it defined and continues to define who I am.

And therein lies the issue. How many times have we seen a simple experience get blown up to crazy proportions at each telling? I love to socialize and so do my close group of friends who often share in the adventures and mischief. In sharing these, my lifestyle and perceptions of my life has taken on a life of it’s own and been blown up to sometimes hilarious proportions.

I wasn’t born with a silver spoon, but life hasn’t entirely been unkind to me. I’ve been fortunate and have had a fairly fruitful career that has allowed me to maintain a fairly charmed life. I do enjoy the finer points in life, and I do try to remain anchored firmly on solid ground too. I credit, blame and am ultimately thankful for that part of my upbringing.

I do admit to prefer living the luxurious lifestyle. Honestly, who doesn’t, rite? If I see something I like and know that it is within my means, I usually do not blink or think twice before getting it. Clothes, car, house, watch, phone, holidays, lifestyle, etc… you know, all the materialistic stuff. If it’s within reach, I will go for it. I swear, shrinks would have a field day with me…’cos it all goes back to my childhood.

How much of this is a result of the fact that as I grew up, despite being able to afford the new toys and stuff out there, I was constantly denied. I remember all those times when a new fad or toy was the coolest thing in the world and everyone had one but me. I guess I’m making up for back then.

Don’t get me wrong though. I’m not a rebel without a cause. I do believe that I still have my feet on solid level ground and it is this that surprises people who expect me to be a high maintenance, arrogant stuck up terror all the time, yet when they get to know me, realize that I am no more a monster than they are. =P

Yet this reputation and impression of a glitzy high maintenance arrogant prick of a monster predominates the perception of most people. Do I tire of it? I don’t think so… In truth, I couldn’t give a hoot and that in itself, helps feed this out of control, larger than life misconception of me. There just isn’t any winning this. Do I regret this? Nah. Do I care? Hell, NO!

Oh ya… btw, Mentos… don’t worry… I’m not bitching about you calling me high maintenance, ok? You just contributed to an idea for a long overdue posting. And smile ya, henceforth, you are now known as Mentos. Not exactly the… umm… nice, pretty & classy pseudonym that you wanted, but mention Mentos and I will think of you… & the fact that you so know it’s you, it’s appropriate, no? After all, how many people will slip and fall for want of a Mentos? =)